Discovering Your Identity in Christ After Years of Feeling Lost

If someone asked you right now, Who are you? how would you answer?

Not what you do.
Not what season you’re in.
Not what other people have called you over the years.

But who you are at your core.

For almost 35 years, I didn’t know how to answer that question. And I didn’t even realize how much that lack of clarity was shaping every decision I made in my life, my relationships, and my business.

I want to share what it looked like to discover my identity in Christ after years of feeling lost, and why this has become one of the most grounding, freeing shifts of my life.

Living Through Seasons Without Knowing Who You Are

Looking back, I can clearly see how many versions of myself I tried to become over the years.

When I moved to the United States, I wrapped my identity around living the “American dream.”
Then for a while, I was a runner. Training, races, half marathons, even a full marathon. That became my whole personality. Later, motherhood changed everything. I experienced a miscarriage, two healthy pregnancies, weight gain, a new body, a new rhythm of life, and I barely recognized myself anymore.
Then I lost weight, built a successful business, hit financial goals, and once again thought, okay… now what?

From the outside, things looked good. But internally, I felt disconnected. I didn’t know who I was beyond the roles I was playing or the achievements I was chasing.

The world kept telling me to “embrace who I am,” “love myself more,” “be authentic.”
But no one ever explained what that actually meant.

The Moment Everything Shifted

About six months ago, I met Jesus in a very real, undeniable way. And for the first time in my life, I heard something that changed everything.

There is a difference between who the world says you are and who God says you are.

I learned about identity in Christ. Not as a concept, but as a foundation. And I realized that I had spent my entire life trying to figure myself out instead of receiving the truth of who I was created to be.

That’s when I did an exercise that I had never seen before, even though it’s well known in Christian circles.

And it broke me open in the best way.

The Identity Exercise That Changed Everything

One quiet morning, I set aside an hour alone. No phone. No distractions. Just honesty.

I wrote a list of everything I believed about myself. Mostly the hard thoughts.

I am scared.
I am not enough.
I am lonely.
I am insecure about my body.

Seeing those words on paper was devastating. I realized how harsh I had been toward myself for decades.

Then I closed my eyes and imagined myself in one of my favorite peaceful places. I pictured Jesus walking toward me. I handed Him that list.

In my mind, He hugged me… and then tore the list into pieces.

I looked at Him and asked one question:
Who do You say I am?

And I started writing again.

This time, the words were completely different.
Loved.
Chosen.
Capable.
Strong.
Seen.
Purposeful.

I wrote a letter called Aline’s Identity in Christ, starting with “I am Aline…” and built it entirely from those words.

I read that letter every single morning. It lives in my closet. I read it when fear shows up, before important meetings, when I feel insecure, and even before recording episodes like this one.

My husband and I both did this exercise. We keep our letters side by side and return to them often.

Identity in Christ Is Not a One-Time Moment

This isn’t something you do once and move on from.

You can return to this exercise again and again in different seasons of your life.

The first time I saw it, it was framed around identity as a wife.
But you can also do this to clarify who you are in the marketplace, who you are as a leader, who you are as a mother, or who God is shaping you to be in a new season.

Each time, it brings alignment back.

Because what you think about yourself and what others say about you will never be as powerful as what God says you are.

Why This Matters for Your Life and Your Business

When you operate from your identity in Christ, everything changes.

You stop performing.
You stop striving.
You stop chasing validation.

You make decisions from peace instead of fear.
You build from calling instead of comparison.
You show up fully as yourself, without needing to prove anything.

This has impacted how I live, how I parent, how I serve my clients, and how I build my business.

And it’s why clarity keeps coming the more I say yes, even when I don’t have the full picture yet.

An Invitation for You

If you feel like you’ve lived many versions of yourself and still feel unsure who you really are, I want to encourage you to try this exercise.

Set aside quiet time.
Write honestly.
Ask God who He says you are.
And return to that truth when the old thoughts try to creep back in.

If you do this, I would truly love to hear about your experience.

You can send me a message on Instagram or reach out however feels right to you. These conversations matter, and you don’t have to walk through them alone.